Oh, no, here comes the sadness….and the frustration….better go eat!
This might not be our conscious reasoning but our underlying assumptions about ourselves not being able to tolerate negative feelings. And it does make sense. Most of us are not primed to talking about, our actually even acknowledging, what we are feeling at any given moment, largely because society and our daily life dictate that we “get shit done”. And the fastest and most productive way of getting shit done is not to make space for our emotions…or so we think. We are taught to feel bad about feeling bad because nobody wants to be or deal with a sour puss. We are taught that vulnerability is a sign of weakness. We are taught that no good comes from having a big ol’ cry.
But what happens when we push down our feelings so far that they begin to manifest themselves as stress, self loathing, belly aches, body hatred or a monkey setting up permanent shop on your back?
We eat that’s what!
So consider this: feelings resemble our physical senses in the sense that they simply give us information about how our internal world perceives things in the external world. We might want to feel more glad as opposed to sad and mad but that is not always for us to decide. We can however change the way we feel ABOUT our feelings, that is, stop criticizing yourself for the way we feel(or don’t feel) and start making (at least a little) room for your emotions in your everyday life.
Avoiding pain and seeking pleasure is a part of the human condition and eating our feelings is a coping mechanism when we can’t stand the pain, but putting more pain on the pain that is already there is really just adding insult to injury and further complicating our struggles with food and body.
So begin thinking about how you feel about having certain feelings, abolish the knee jerk reaction to label them as good or bad, realize that they are just (often misguided)information about how you truly feel and you might notice that you no longer have the need to sneak brownies as soon as you feel (insert feeling here).